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EVER FEEL LIKE YOU STAND OUT IN A CROWD?
All children have habits, whether good or bad. Some bad habits make a child uncomfortable and even stand out in a crowd. The obvious suggestion is to praise the good habits while trying to put the bad habits to rest. This is a lot harder than it sounds. Children often get involved with the wrong crowd, or see a respected adult participate in something which may be considered a poor habit, then mimic this behavior. They may even fall to peer pressure, which eventually can lead a child down a negative path.
PREVENTING A HABIT
How do you prevent a child from picking up a bad habit such as smoking, drugs, alcohol, or a sedentary lifestyle? While there are no definitive answers to this question (since all situations and children are different), here are some general suggestions.
Make sure the parents are good role models. This means they live a healthy lifestyle 24/7, especially when their children are present. Smoking, drinking, alcohol, or a sedentary lifestyle should never take place around a child. This does not mean an adult cannot sit in front of a TV and watch a show with their child. It just means setting an example by leading as an example. If a parent is always watching TV and never getting off the couch, a poor example is being set.
Teach your children to have an open line of communication at a very young age. Let them know they always have an 'open door' with regard to discussion. Starting young will teach them to discuss any concerns they have with their exposure to the world.
STAND OUT IN A POSITIVE WAY!
Teach your children what peer pressure means. Use the peer pressure page on this website as a guide.
Try to get involved in your child's life. Ask non-invasive questions frequently so they know you care about them. If you only ask questions when they partake in some form of suspicious activity, they may not respond to you.
Try to create some type of fun, non-threatening contract between you and your child which may assist in breaking the habit.
Get to know your child's friends. Sometimes, you can learn about your child through their friends. In many cases, their friends may convey information to you to help out your child. In an opposite approach, you may see one of your child's friends around town participating in some activity you do not approve of. You can then share this new found information with your child.
Realize there is no magic formula when it comes to preventing habits. Watch your children closely. Notice changes in their behavior, and pay attention to questions they may ask you. Being sensitive to their needs and behaviors is an excellent start. Understand that all children are different. What may have worked with one of your children may not work with your other child.
STOPPING THE HABIT
If a child does form a bad habit, how do you stop it? There are some methods, but you must figure out which one works best for your child. All personalities and habits are different, so they all must be handled differently.
First and foremost, always seek professional consultation for your child if needed. Your pediatrician, guidance counselor, teacher, coach, school nurse, or principal would all be a great help. They could tell you what steps to use to help your child.
STOPPING COLD TURKEY MAY WORK!
Your consultant may inform you to stop your child's bad habit cold turkey. "Cold turkey" is an expression describing the actions of a person who gives up a habit all at once.
Your consultant may inform you to stop your child's bad habit using the gradual method. In this scenario, a child stops a bad habit a little bit at a time.
If the above two methods have no success, your consultant may ask you to consider counseling or medication. Again, leave this up to the professionals who deal with such topics on a frequent basis.
Praise positive behaviors! When a child does something positive, let them know. The worst thing to do is let a child know they did something negative on a consistent basis, or in front of others. With this method, the child knows you are viewing them in a positive manner opposed to a negative manner.
Never punish a bad habit.
Try not to take something away without giving something in return. For example, if you are going to take away sugary snacks from kids, replace it with a sweet fruit. Another example may be, if you take away TV time from a kids, replace it with a basketball or skateboard. The thought is to not just take something away but replace/substitute with a healthy alternative.
Don't fight the child's brain, just work with it. For example, if you are worried about your child eating too much at night, have your child brush their teeth a little earlier so their brain realizes they are done consuming food for the night.
Reward good behavior with something they enjoy. For example, if they act in a positive manner, they can play with their favorite toy, or have a friend come over to the house to play.
Lastly, do not jump to conclusions too quickly. This means, do not deem something to be a bad habit if your child does it just one time. Kids are curious by nature, and may experiment new things. If they start to perform these acts on a consistent basis with less and less control, it is time to talk with them about these actions.